So, to finish off the week… I am going to step upon my “high horse” for a bit…. And ask you… what in the world are you waiting for?  When are you “gonna” start?  Now, this isn’t meant for everyone, but YOU will know who I am writing this for (or, the “other side folks” – who are really writing this…)  On Wednesday, I (well, all of us) wrote about vampire thinking…. Followed by Thursday’s  “what to do if….” So again I ask… what are you waiting for?  What excuses have you come up with today so you don’t have to start?  Is it another blog to read? Another book to order and read?  Another class to sign up for? Another friend to confer with? Are you too tired?  Are you too sick?  Who do you have to rescue today?  What or who has your attention so it is off from you?  What corner of your mind are you residing in so this all doesn’t exist?  What “outside” events have your attention so you don’t have enough time?  Do you use allergies as an excuse  to “take the day/week/month/year” off? (This could also be I can’t focus today because it is raining or the energy is too heavy or I am too sad, etc.) Oh, this is a good one… I need to be in a relationship first, I will be complete then I can go forward……

I’ve been listening to so many folks recently talk and “whine” about why things aren’t going their way… they talk about starting something  “when” life starts… I’ll do something “when” the new begins, as soon as I am done with *******, I can’t do anything yet because my mom, dad, (whomever) will be upset with me, I don’t have enough money, I don’t know what I want, I don’t know what to do, I don’t know where to go.  And then there are the folks that start, but get distracted and aren’t consistent with putting one foot ahead of another… then they go back into old patterns, old aches and pains, old diseases, excuses, … basically all the “old” they just left and wonder why in the heck things are all amuck….  They keep doing the things that haven’t worked – they know it – but for some reason, keep doing them because it is known… it is familiar… it is easier than risking putting that one foot forward. They know what “needs” to be done, but just don’t do it. They find excuses and “reasons” why….

 Let’s not get into a war of words here, folks,… just get the concept….  You can’t even imagine how many emails I get “correcting” my terminology, my sentence structure…. Well, really, most of the time I don’t mind… but today… any of that will be a distraction from going within…. Today is not about me… this is about each of you… knowing YOU….

This isn’t about leaping, running, charging forward… this is all about doing something… about engaging… about taking baby steps.  Perhaps you start with something and don’t like it, well, then, change directions… this is NOT a mis-step… this is YOU exploring YOU.  What pattern do you activate to keep you from taking the next step?

So commit to doing something… anything…. Really… it is time….

So I (well, we —- lots of “folks here with me today) are stepping off my high horse now….

If I just drank alcohol… this would certainly be a good time to push down a few (is that even how it is said???)… Oh, well, coffee will do…. (o:

We hear all about affirmations and thinking positive.  That is easier said than done.  Our thoughts are important because they do go out and attract those same thoughts back to us.  So, in other words, worry attracts worry.  Doubt attracts doubt.  Fear attracts fear.  So why isn’t it easy just to say “I feel great!” Or “I look amazing! and then instantly feel it?  It is because even though you say those “positive” things, only when you make an AGREEMENT with them moment to moment can your vibration and results change.

So, how do you get yourself to agree with the Truth of you rather than the circumstances?  It is remembering moment to moment that the circumstances you are experiencing now are not a defining of you or what is possible. Everything in your life right now is a reflection of the thoughts, beliefs and actions you have taken.  If you have self-defeating thoughts or self-sabotaging behaviors, it is not because you are bad or wrong.  It is because they have been conditioned in you to fulfill some need or were developed without your awareness.

These self-destructive patterns have created results that are not what you want.  But, it is important to know if you7r created things and circumstances you don’t want, you can also, by that same power, create what you DO want.  It doesn’t happen immediately, because in the cause and effect Universe, we are affected by our past choices.  However, over time, results do change as we continue to think, believe and act in a way that is in alignment with the circumstances we do want.

When you learn how to use your power as a creator, you have the wisdom to create a life you love no matter what is happening.  That is why it is so important to have support (mentors, teachers, healers, book, audios) during this process.  Sometimes you feel like you should jus “get it.” But, remember, you are overcoming years of conditioning, so be patient with yourself.

Think of your negative results as a bucket filled with muddy water.  How do you get the mud out?  You keep filling the bucket with fresh water.  In other words, you keep filling your bucket with the Truth of who you are.  Eventually the muddy water leaves and you have a clean bucket of water.

This may take the support of another person during this process.  If you are not used to receiving support, allow yourself to be guided to someone or something that will help you.  When you take care of YOU, your whole life and everything in it changes.  Giving to yourself is a practice of self-love.  You can’t give to another what you don’t have within you.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm, I am learning this daily… hopefully, so are you… now – coffee?

I recently came across a concept called “vampire thinking”.  I really don’t know the source, but I think it really describes some behaviors.  Vampire thinking is the compulsion we all have to suck the juice right out of our possibilities and opportunities.  Instead of acting on a good idea, we excel at finding a slew of reason we should kill it as soon as possible and move on to continuing our “safe” existence.  I am sure you can relate to this idea because you possibly engage in vampire thinking more frequently than you may know.  How often do you talk yourself right out of what you really want in order that you may choose for the safe option?  And your reasons?  Really… what are your reasons?  Mine, after some “thinking” about all of this… are quite silly, ridiculous and fear filled. 

Like all successful vampires, vampire thinking has a lot of tricks up its sleeves, which most people never notice.  These tricks, however, are the true disguises worn by vampire thinking and they are important to recognize if we want to “fend” them off (stab ‘em with a wooden spike?).  So we are going to take the masks off the vampire tricksters and see what “they” are really up to.

How many of these “vampire thinking tricksters” can you recognize in your repertoire of behaviors?  Be aware… the more honest you are here, the better your chances to “save” what you’ve been squandering and retrieve lost opportunities….. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Can’t cause I am not sure…… “Well, I would do it  – if I could be sure it was the right thing or I could be sure it would work.” We can hardly be sure we will take our next breath, let alone do things guaranteed to succeed.  Being sure is just a smoke screen call: “I would rather hide from what I am capable of.  We know there are no guarantees.  We think we are being smart about our choices, when what we are really doing is shrinking from our responsibilities and hiding from our true gifts and talents.  We are unwilling to takes risks.  We like things that we feel we have control over and that are predictable.  We have bought into the lie that says we are safer that way.  The question begging to be asked is: “How can we be safer when shrinking and shirking means we have less of everything?” …or when you know you are sure AFTER you have done it which then it becomes a moot point.

Striving to always be right….. Many of us find it very important to engage in “I’m right and you’re wrong” thinking.  There is something about being right that feeds our ego and our need to compete in the pecking order around us.  BUT, this is a perfect example of a vampire trickster at work because being right robs us of the opportunity to learn and grow.  Being right actually restricts our ability to develop naturally because all of our energy and our focus goes into being right.  We don’t ask questions because we may be wrong and we don’t allow ourselves to risk making mistakes.  All of our creative thinking is spend on propping ourselves up to ensure our being right prevails at all costs and at all times.  Have you ever noticed that the most successful among us have also failed more time than they have succeeded? Knowing you are right comes from knowing when you aren’t.

Looking good at all costs….. This is a very popular trickster move that can quickly turn into a habit.  Its basic vampire thinking premise is to always do whatever we must do to not look bad.  If we have to lie, cheat, steal (even on a small scale) we will do what it takes to look good.  Of course, many unethical, unlawful, and harmful things are done in the name of looking good.  There are also many less obvious and smaller scale actions that we take regularly such as telling little white lies, exaggerations, misrepresentations, gossip and putting down or competing with others all to make ourselves look better. What we gain from these behaviors is the illusion that we look good to others.  What we sacrifice is honesty with ourselves and others.  This behavior is like winding poison strings throughout our life and damaging our potential. It is a prop that… in the end ALWAYS falls down… so get out of it now!!!

Can’t make a decision…. “I wish I could decide but I just can’t so I guess I won’t do it”.  In this trickster thinking, the person tries to take themselves off the hook by backing down as the safe think to do since they can’t decide.  If you look at this reasoning, you can easily see the flaws and the smoke and mirrors in this way of thinking.  Of course you can decide – unless you are too busy coming up with all of the reasons why you shouldn’t do it!!!  This is classic vampire thinking. You do know that by not deciding – you have decided and the answer is no….

Justifying my actions and rationalizing my behavior….. These are the more obvious tricksters we are used to doing business with.  Justifying and rationalizing are the excuses and so call “causes” we use every day in the place of growth steps and taking the right actions: “I was sick”, “I was depressed”, “I was tired”, “I was too busy”, “It was too late”, “It wasn’t my fault”, “I had an emergency”, “I tried”, “I didn’t write it down”, “They don’t care anyway”,  “It makes me uncomfortable”, and on and on and on. Those excuses continually rob us of opportunities to do good things in the world for ourselves and others.  And because they are so commonly used and accepted, we have lost our awareness of them and the thieves they are. (And you really have to be very careful of the words you use.  The universe provides you what you ask for… it provides “completes” so if you say you are tired… you will be.  Then you have two things to do… overcome the tiredness that you stated you have and then still “do” the very thin you want to do.

 Is there a day that goes by when you don’t justify your behavior or actions either to yourself or to others?  I doubt it… I’d like to say I don’t but this is all about getting real with the self, right?  Do yourself a favor and count the times you rationalize in a day and the times you rationalize in a week and see what number you come up with.  Then look at that number of “cowardly acts” (really I tried to come up with a different word here, but this one kept rearing its ugly head) and “copping out” choices as the number of good acts you were not able to do for yourself and others as a result. As the question when you find yourself rationalizing… “Who is talking?” Is it you or your vampire self?  Then YOU chose who is in control.

Ask yourself any of these questions:

On a scale of 1 – 10, how important is this to me?

How long am I willing to continue to sacrifice what is most important to me?

Who would I be if I stopped making excuses for myself?

What would I have if I ceased rationalizing and justifying my behavior?

What am I willing to do right now to stop?

So here are lots of luck and best wishes as you uncover and expose the vampire thinking tricksters that are sucking the fun and satisfaction from your life every day.  And let’s throw in the courage to face the vampire thinking trickster squarely and bravely and put them in their place (again wooden stakes?)…  All the richness, variety and spoils of the life you’ve been avoiding await your courage and determination.  You can let go of these sucking pests and live boldly by YOUR rules…

Hey… what a journey, huh?  I do believe the vampires hate coffee more than wooden stakes…. Have some with me????

Ok that is where this blog ended originally… but I sent it out to a couple of friends – just to see if I “got” the idea across… a couple gave me a few “hints” and “words” to add to the body and another wrote the following… it is so insightful that I am adding the complete feedback I received…. And a big thank you to you “folks” that helped me out here…

“It seems to be another way of saying and emphasizing common human qualities.  I like the words “vampire sucking” as it denotes sucking away our possibilities and I won’t say dreams as dreams denotes something we strive after…and something that is there for us to claim.  Could you challenge the group/clients to come up with specific statements of vampire sucking/thinking to share with a larger group??? (I think this is a great idea… perhaps either by comment or by emailing me… feeling brave??? Diane)  And I might add that we alone are our own vampires.  Vampire sucking might give the impression that a force outside of ourselves is sucking our energy.  As far as I am concerned, we are affecting our own energy ourselves by our thoughts and intentions or lack of each that are directional so to speak.  There is no one sucking at us as might be suggested by the terms “vampire sucking”. But that we are our own vampire. 

As some of the things I have said to myself and some I still say are:.

It doesn’t matter anyway as I am at the later part of my life and it is time to retire and coast

Can’t do it because I don’t have the support I need!

Why work so hard anymore.  I have worked hard all my life.

I have done enough in this lifetime.  It is time to relax and just let things happen.

I’ll be taken care of one way or the other so I don’t worry about it.

I don’t have time.

These are some examples of how I suck the energy out of dreams and possibilities at times.

There are sooooooo many sneaky ways to avoid our greatness.  But then, I would ask you, once these ways are identified, what then?  It is kind of like telling a kid “no you can’t do that” and not offer another way to behave…options/alternatives.  There is plenty of literature out there that gives words and passion to “ways to expand our energy and ride the energy of possibilities to completion”.  And it is each of our choices.  As I have looked back over time lately, I have come to realized that I have taken many chances and risks in life…however, the many “main” external reasons for my being here in “purpose”, can at times be  reasons steeped in fear…fear of failure, fear of success, fear of inadequacies, etc.  Not as much as before but they are noticeable.  However these days, I notice them and keep on a keeping on anyway.  I realize I am working on my goals and reasons to contribute to people communities during this transition and it is unfolding slowly.  I no longer am willing to push it and push it “through to fruition”…more of a gentle letting go and letting it unfold.  Very different for me than 15-20 years ago.  The best thing that I am learning is that “it doesn’t matter anyway”…..don’t misunderstand me, but it is about being in neutral.  No investment if it works or not I guess.  Just keep the intention and keep going forward.”

Now, I am going to go get coffee…..